DA 2010 Episode 15: Beautiful Emptiness
by AngelExposed
Summary: They've gotten away from Genosha, but that doesn't mean everything is fantastic. Rogue is still desperate to tell Remy how she feels, Remy is still feeling tender, and Kitty is still mooning over Piotr without knowing what to say. (Finished R&R)
1. Chapter 1: The Scar Someone Bears

Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 15

Chapter 1: A Scar Someone Bears

          Rogue had been watching Remy from where he'd been sitting on a bench at the back of the blackbird.  He looked a million miles away as he had done the minute he'd come out of the GMCF.  He was donning a blanket and that was all, he smelled like burning hair and he looked hurt but wouldn't allow himself to be treated right now.

          She couldn't find the words to say to him even though she'd waited so long for the moment she could be with him again and just tell him she loved him.  The words didn't seem to want to come out.

          Remy had barely looked at her either, and she was beginning to wonder if she'd done something wrong or if he was slightly mad at her for being there in the first place. 

          She wished she could find it in herself to rush to his arms and hold onto him, climb into his lap and never let go, but she just couldn't.  Something was holding her back and she wasn't sure what it was exactly.   Maybe it was that Bobby seemed a little sore with her still, or maybe it was just what Kitty had said to her back in Genosha, that maybe Carol Danvers was really controlling her emotions for Remy.  It left her uneasy.

          _What now_?  She thought dully as she stared intently at Remy LeBeau, wondering what was going on in that mind of his.  _Will he stay with the X-Men, or will he take off again_?   The thought of it made her want to cry but she held them back and pretended to be more interested in a smudge of dirt on the knee of her orange coveralls until her eyes were no longer glazed over.

          Kitty had been abnormally quiet also during the whole trip.  Everyone had, really.  Their ordeal had left them with a lot of things to think about.  In the period of a few days they'd encountered what a thousand mutants had encountered over weeks, months, even years.  And they came to ask themselves how could they have never known about this.  Magneto just disappeared into nowhere, never heard from again and they thought he would give up?   They felt incredibly stupid, and almost as if this whole ordeal may have been prevented if they'd looked for Magneto a long time ago.

          Rogue could hold back no more, she unbuckled her seatbelt, and got up slowly.  Pain still caused her body to feel taut and ache with every slight movement that this was a struggle. 

She gave a glance to the front of the jet, Professor Xavier and Jean were piloting.  They'd used the communications to arrange transportation for the other mutants on Genosha as much as they could.  It was up to them to make their exits now.  The professor had also gotten in touch with Muir Island to advise Monet was safe and sound and of her bravery.

Rogue could barely believe Monet's bravery.  She'd pulled through, and had seemed to have learned a few things.  Monet had barely said anything throughout the journey, where as usually she would have had more than a few things to say.  Rogue hoped this would mean a quieter and more congenial Monet in future.

The Blackbird was probably halfway home to Bayville by now, Rogue had not known, she'd been given some painkillers from the first aid box that had made her extremely drowsy and she'd nodded off for a short while.  The sleep had not helped much and when she'd awakened the pain only seemed worse, but at least she could move a little easier than she'd been able to. 

          Rogue headed down towards the back of the jet.  Remy was the only one who sat there, as if he couldn't bear to be with the others right now.  "Are…are you okay?" Rogue asked softly, she sat down on the bench beside him, and looked to him.  He looked bad.  Tired, paler than usual, eyes dark underneath, in bad need of a shave, clumps of his hair singed so that it was uneven in length, and he was wearing nothing but ugly brown blanket.  It wasn't his finest moment.

          Remy turned and looked at her, "are you?" he asked, almost pointedly, his eyes met hers, a meaningful look that did not completely penetrate her emotions at that moment.

          "Why were you naked?" Rogue asked softly, remembering the moment she'd see him standing there in the doorway of the GMCF.  If he had not been naked, she might have thought he was another clone.  She'd noticed the scar, and the tiny spade tattoo upon his hip.  Her heart had soared that very moment, knowing he was live.

          "And like you haven't been fantasizing about that all day?" he asked, a smirk came, but a very empty smirk it was.

          "Only thing I was fantasizing about…was finding you safe…" Rogue said softly and she reached out to touch his blanketed arm.

          Remy flinched away, "ow…"

          "Oh…sorry…forgot…you're pretty beaten up…" she chewed her lip, "you should let Hank look at those burns…"

          "I'll be fine.  I've had burns before…" he assured, he looked to the floor, pulling the blanket closer around him.

          "Okay…" Rogue said, and fell silent not sure what to say.  It almost felt for a moment as if he were a stranger there.  She felt like a stranger herself.  Being in the prison had changed things a lot.  Suddenly, she wasn't so sure her life would be the same as it had been before.  "Remy…" she said softly.

          "Hmm?" he asked casually, as if nothing was bothering him although she knew him well enough not to believe that act.

          "Why didn't you tell us…what was going on…you…you could have came to us…how could you have not…"

          "Because you all thought I was a murderer," he pointed out.   "If…I'd gone to you, I think this might have all gotten worse a lot sooner anyway," he sighed.

          Rogue nodded, although she didn't fully understand what he meant, there seemed to be something he was leaving out, but she didn't want to press it, he'd been as quiet enough as it was.

          "Did the clones do that to you?" he asked, gesturing to her bruised face and black eye.

          "Yeah," Rogue touched her face gingerly, "hurts like hell…" she added with a slight pout.

          "They…could be pretty brutal…I got on the wrong side of their beatings many times.  Most of the time I won…after all, they got my memories…I know how they would fight…but occasionally…I'd end up losing, and it'd always hurt like hell…"

          Rogue nodded.

          Remy gestured towards Logan who was asleep in a seat nearer the front, his arm could be seen tangling over the armrest, "…why…don't you ask Logan…to, you know, let you use his powers so you can heal it away?  It'd be much nicer than goin' through all this pain…" his voice sounded dry.

          Rogue drew her breath, "I could do that I suppose…and I know he wouldn't mind at all…after all, he recovers more quickly from my powers than anyone, it'd be no skin off his back at all," she added, "but…I think I'd rather sit the pain out…" she explained softly.

          Remy looked confuse, "why, Rogue?" he asked, his voice tired and weak.  "Why put yourself through that when it's completely unnecessary.

          "Because…" Rogue sighed, "it's like a scar someone bears to remind themselves of why they did something…" she said pointedly.

          Remy swallowed and looked away.  "Yeah..." he touched the scar on his chest with a strange emotional look over his face.  "I think I understand."

          Rogue gave him a good look over, "Remy…you…are really you, aren't you?" she asked, just to be sure.

          "Is that a trick question, Rogue?" he asked.

          Rogue smirked a little, "Just checking."

          "Looks like Rogue and Remy are maybe trying to work things out…" Kitty said, glancing around her seat to look at the two at the back of the jet.

          Piotr Rasputin sat beside her, he looked thoroughly exhausted, he turned and glanced over the top of his seat, "I see," he said softly.

          "Must have been hell for her, you know," Kitty said, "all those years of…loving him…and regretting never being able to tell him she loved him…and then thinking he was dead and believing she'd never…tell him again…or hear him say it…"

          Piotr looked at Kitty, seemingly mystified, "I am sure it must have been hard…but they are together for the time being, if not emotionally at least within close proximity.  There is always a chance."

          Kitty nodded, "yeah," her cheeks flushed a little.  She felt like a little girl.  She'd been aching to say she cared for Piotr ever since they'd left Genosha, and the words did not want to come out.  Every time she started to get around to it, she'd change the subject.  She'd tried mild hints – like with her topic about Rogue and Remy, but nothing seemed to penetrate that thick skull of his.  He seemed totally clueless about her feelings.

          Kitty decided to try something else.  "God I can't wait to get home," she gave an exhausted groan, "to get into a hot…steamy…bubble bath…maybe with some wine…snuggle into my big old bed…" she glanced to him, to see if this suggestive comment might stir anything in him, but no…nothing.

          "I must leave when we return to Bayville," Piotr sighed.

          "Why?" Kitty squeaked, a little too quickly and frantically, then smiled, "I mean…you need a little R&R don't you?  Just like the rest of us, you should stay until your batteries are fully recharged.  I think when we get back we should have a big celebration…to uhm…celebrate…Remy's defeat over Magneto…"

          Piotr seemed to consider this.  "I do have other obligations though…often people need my help…what if someone needs me right at this moment…"

          "C'mon, you're hurt and tired like the rest of us, you need to unwind first.  You're no good to anyone like this," Kitty pointed out, "and besides, Illyana would absolutely die if you didn't stay at least a little longer…" Kitty added, "she's probably worried sick about you right now" she explained, "the professor sent a message to Muir Island to advise them Monet was okay and what happened, Illyana is probably frantic with worry about you."

          Piotr thought about this, then nodded, "alright, I shall stay an extra few days until – as you put it – I have recharged my batteries."

          Kitty's large sapphire eyes twinkled, and she widely grinned, "great."


	2. Chapter 2: Very Little Emotion

Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 15

Chapter 2: Very Little Emotion

          When the X-Men arrived back to the Mansion they were surprised to find four unconscious clones in their foyer, and even more surprised to find one completely dead clone in Jean Grey's bedroom.  Monet had said nothing but simply slipped off to her room intent on sleeping the next few days off.  Many of the X-Men had followed that example.

          Scott and Bobby had taken the clones out of the mansion, no one else had bothered to ask where they'd been put or what had been done with them, and no one cared.  No one ever wanted to see the clones of Remy again and sometimes even seeing Remy there, they seemed a little jarred. 

          Rogue found herself in her private en-suite bathroom, running the hot water and pouring bubble bath.  She was looking forward to soaking away most of her aches and pains and relaxing for what would be the first time in days.  It was strange how her own bedroom and bathroom seemed so much more grand and exquisite since the return to the mansion.  She'd lived there for so long, she'd forgotten how lucky she was to have lived in comfort and safety. 

She couldn't have imagined spending two years within the walls of that prison such as Lorna Dane and the others had.  How long had Remy spent there, she wondered?  She didn't feel he was ready to be questioned about it yet.  He seemed tender.  It was the end of something that he'd been involved with for what seemed to be a very long time – almost the seven years he'd been gone if this matched up with his criminal record on the global criminal database.  That was a chilling thought. 

_What drove him to it_? She wondered.  She knew there must have been a catalyst somewhere.  She unbuttoned the orange coveralls carefully, and slipped it off her shoulders and gazed at herself in the mirrored wall that surrounded three sides of the bathtub.  The bruises there were worse than she'd expected.  Her ribs and stomach were black and blue, there were smaller bruises elsewhere that must have been gained through her manual labour.  There were some tiny burns near her neck she had not noticed before, she realised they'd probably resulted from the MX2Beetle.  "Damn…" she sucked in a breath, it looked as painful as it felt that was for sure.

_But this was for Remy_, she told herself softly, _it's worth it_…

She let herself relax as much as she could for the time being.  She was home, and Remy was in the building and that was good enough for her at the moment.

Kitty had been exhausted but when she'd taken a quick shower and climbed into bed, sleep had not come.  She got up to wander around the halls.  Her body ached but she didn't care, it was good to be home, and it was nice to re-appreciate the luxury of the mansion once again. 

She was surprised to run into Remy in the hallway, he apparently hadn't been able to sleep either, although he looked as if he might be in dire need of it.

"Whoah…" Kitty said, "I didn't think you'd still be up."

"Can't sleep," Remy gave a soft chuckle, "must be the comfort of the bed.  See I'm used to hanging from a wall…" he explained.

Kitty looked at him, "I can fix some warm milk…that might help?"

"I guess we could try it," Remy shrugged.  "How've you been, Petit?"

Kitty smiled, it was nice to hear him call her by that old nickname.  It felt familiar, and reminded her of their bond.  "I've been…well, I don't know, these last few weeks I've done NOTHING but look for you so…I don't know how I am…but…I feel better."

          Remy seemed to have something on the tip of his tongue as they headed down the staircase, into the foyer and towards the kitchen, he did not say anything, he seemed to be biting on his words.

          "I…I don't think I'll ever really be over my parents deaths," Kitty said, realising what he wanted to ask about, "but…your being there…kind of helped more than anything else did…" she said softly.

          Remy smiled a little, "glad to know I was of some comfort, even if it was only lettin' you stay in my shitty apartment."

          Kitty stepped into the kitchen and turned on the light, "Remy…I gotta ask…" she said softly, "what happened that night…?"

          Remy looked away, "I…I've spent so long mullin' over what happened, that…I'd rather not think about it…just for one night…if that's alright?" he asked, "I promise…if y' got any questions, I'll answer them in time, but…I'm a little raw right now…I think we all are…and I need to think of anything but Genosha…okay?"

          Kitty nodded, "okay…" she reached her hand into the fridge by phasing it in, she pulled out the milk, "Remy…can I ask a question?" she asked softly.

          "As long as it's not related in any way to Genosha, Illinois…or any of my previous convictions which no doubt you've probably found out about by now if you managed to find me in Genosha," he stated.

          Kitty chuckled, "No…it's not about that," she said, using a shyer tone, "it's…about well…guys."

          "Kitty, you're, what, twenty-two?" Remy asked as he sat at the table.

          Kitty pulled a pot out of a small cupboard, "Twenty-three," she replied.

          "Surely you know about guys by now," he pointed out.

          "Of course I do, but I don't know about EVERY guy…and besides…there are just some things I just DON'T know about all guys…but…you might have some insight.  You're a guy after all," she reminded.

          "Last time I checked, I was," Remy stated.  "If not I'm definitely wearin' the wrong underwear."

          Kitty gave a soft laugh, "seriously, can I ask you this question or not?" she poured some milk into the pot and put it on the stove, turning the gas on.

          "Fire away," Remy stated, he toyed absently with a salt shaker on the kitchen table.

          "Okay…well…there's this guy I like."

          "Piotr," Remy said without even pausing to think about it.

          Kitty gaped, "how did you—I mean…when…I don't---huh?"

          "Don't be stupid, Kitty, that look you gave him when we were gettin' on the blackbird, it was obvious.  I can see what the problem is too, he's obviously as thick as shit and doesn't know you like him, right?"

          Kitty folded her arms, "you astound me," she looked at him in awe.

          "It's a gift," Remy shrugged, "so…you want advice how to get his undivided attention?"

          "Well…yeah, kinda," Kitty blushed.

          Remy remained silent for a moment, "I'd advise being yourself, in that case, don't be overly obvious, because, it's the unsexiest thing in the world when a girl is waaaaaaay too obvious," he explained.

          Kitty sat down, "how so?"

          "It just is, it's like desperation.  If you see someone desperate to be with you it can be kind of jarring," Remy stated.  "Instead of just dropping hints – like you were on the jet – which by the way, I heard – try just coming out with something straight…you're not good enough at flirting to pull off the 'I'm gonna take a hot steamy bath' routine either," he smirked.

          "You're such a shit, you were listening?!" Kitty smacked his arm.

          "Yeah, well, Rogue had stopped talking after a while, and I'd run out of things to say," he shrugged.

          "How are you and Rogue coping…you gonna get back together?" Kitty asked.

          "I don't see it," Remy stated, "it's like I told you back in Illinois, petit.  We got too much history…too many things went wrong that will keep getting brought up with crisis calls, and you know with us it always does," he looked away, a great sadness growing in his intense eyes.

          "Yeah, I know," Kitty got up and stirred the milk that was warming in the pan, "but it's just…I see you guys together, and you just seem so…meant to be…you both want to be together, and they always say love conquers all, why not just go for it and see what happens?"

          "Because I don't think I can take one more breakup, petit.  I think it'd be the end of me, seriously," he said softly.

          Kitty stopped, "huh?"

          "Petit…I love her…with all my heart…I saw the look on her face when she first saw me back here, she looked so distraught, as if her heart was being torn.  I never want to be the one to make her face look like that again…I never wanna cause anyone that much hurt.  It killed a part of me when I had to go…been feelin' like half a man ever since.  And I was never a whole man to begin with.  I think if I did that to her again, even not meaning to – I'd lose what little emotion I have left…"

          Kitty poured milk into a cup for him and put it down on the table for him, "I think there's a lot more emotion in you than you really believe."

          Remy took a sip of the milk and winced, he'd never been a fan of warm milk.  "I think I know myself better than anyone," he responded.

          "That's where you're wrong," Kitty poured herself a cup and sat down opposite him, "see, you're so used to seeing yourself in the same way that you can't see yourself in the ways that others can…" she reached over and tenderly touched his hand.  "When I see you I see this awesome guy who I really look up to as a friend, you put everything aside to be with me when I really needed you.  You had enough courtesy to push me away when I kissed you – and you could have taken FULL advantage if you were a guy with very little emotion…you wouldn't have saved all those mutants on Genosha…wouldn't have saved humans from extinction for crying out loud…if you had very little emotion…you've done so many awesome things because of all this emotion."

          Remy put his hand to his eyes, he had to cover the tears that were forming there, he pursed his lips together tightly, "I'm not that guy…" he sobbed.

          Kitty got up, "if you're a guy with very little emotion, then why are you crying?" she asked.

          "I'm not…" he lied, trying to stubbornly wipe his tears.  "I'm just losing my mind."

          "Like you ever had it to begin with," Kitty said, deadpan.  And it was just the right thing to say, for it was the first time she'd heard him laugh so heartily in a very long time.


	3. Chapter 3: Charming, Gambit, Charming

Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 15

Chapter 3: Charming, Gambit, Charming

          The next morning was a beautiful day for march, the sun had come out, and warmth flooded over the Xavier estate.  Ororo used her powers to slightly enhance the weather, she made sure not a cloud hung in the sky to block the sun, and made sure the cooler winds was kept at bay.  The grounds were lush and green, the sky a beautiful soft blue, the water on the lake sparkled like flowing diamonds.

          To celebrate the escape from the island and the clones, it had been the Professor's idea to have a barbecue.  The students arrived back from Muir Island in the late morning, and the place was a buzz of excited chatter – even the students seemed to be interested in what Monet had to say about her adventures in the blackbird and her encounters in Genosha.

          Rogue was still sore, but feeling slightly happier as she sat at a patio table near the pool, watching the kids frolic and splash around.  Bobby had not turned up for the barbecue but she was glad of this, as she wasn't sure she could face him right now.  He'd looked even more annoyed with her since Remy had come back with them. 

          Remy had not arrived down for the celebration yet, she supposed he was sleeping in, and quite rightly so, he'd been through a lot.  Kitty and Logan were still also sleeping in.  But the others were full of life again.  Appreciating life more now that they understood how close they'd come to living it in a prison.

          "It's a beautiful day, isn't it?"

          Rogue turned, the Professor was sitting next to her in his wheelchair, he was wearing his less than formal Xavier's Institute T-shirt, it was rare anyone ever saw him in anything other than a suit.  It showed that even the Professor could let loose just a little occasionally.  "Yes, it is," she replied, a little tiredly.

          "Did you sleep at all last night?" The Professor asked, sipping on Alison's homemade lemonade, which had been popular with everyone – and judging by everyone's excitement and boundless energy, there was probably half a bag of sugar in the stuff as well.

          "A little.  Still pretty sore…but…I'll be fine.  It's different to feel this kind of pain…been so used to having nothing more than a little headache every now and then," she reminded.

          "You've seemed a little edgy since we returned," Professor Xavier admitted quietly.

          "I'm not edgy, just…a little sore," she shrugged, and it hurt to do so.

          "You were talking with Remy on the jet…did he mention whether or not he'd be resuming his career as an X-Man."

          "Not really," Rogue said, "he seems a little on edge himself, now that I think about it…"

          "He's obviously been through alot…as have we all."

          Rogue nodded.

          "Perhaps…it would be best to leave our questions of his ordeal for now…and focus more on this beautiful day, and enjoy the celebrations, hmm?" The professor pointed out.

          Rogue paused for thought, then turned to look at the Professor, "I think you might be right."

          Kitty had barely pulled on the top of her pink bikini when Remy came barging into the bathroom without knocking.

          "REMY!" she gasped.

          "Sorry, petit," he said, he was wearing nothing but his boxer shorts and looking a little more well rested than he had the night previous, "I thought you'd maybe already be out there with the others."

          "Then if you weren't looking for me, why are you coming into my bathroom – wearing nothing but your underwear I might add…" she pointed out.  "Is this a new thing with you, Remy…the less clothes, the better?"

          "Hey, I'd go around commando all the time if I could…if only I wasn't afraid of sunburn or frostbite on my co—"

          "That's plenty," Kitty said, urging him to stop before he went too far, "what you lookin' for?"

          "Scissors," Remy said, "and possibly some kind of razor.  Girls shave their legs…armpits…" he gestured to her, "bikini zone…" he added wiggling his eyebrows.

          Kitty rolled her eyes, "You're back to the old you alright," she said, "here," she took a pair of scissors out of her cabinet, "what you want those for?"

          "Cut off this singed hair," he uttered, "I've been growin' my hair for seven years and it finally gets singed off…bitch, huh?" he asked.

          "You need that hair cut, your hair looks like a horses ass when you wear it in that goddamn ponytail," Kitty responded, "I hate it when guys have longer and prettier hair than I do…" she said, she turned on the shower over her bathtub, "wet your hair," she commanded.

"I can do it," Remy said reaching out for the scissors, "lemme do it, you'll make a mess of it and end up lookin' like somethin' out of 'That 70's Show'," she uttered.

          Remy folded his arms, "fine, just don't cut too much of it off, I wanna keep some of it.  Ladies love long hair."  He bent over the shower and soaked his hair beneath the water, he then wrung it out.

          "Right," Kitty responded, "you have NO idea how much I've wanted to do this," she gave his hair a quick towel dry and brushed his hair quickly. She grabbed a hand full of his hair and began to cut away eagerly.  "By the way…your stuff is still here…y'know, the clothes you were wearing the night in Illinois…its downstairs in the hospital wing…that god awful trenchcoat that's probably older than you are."

          "That coat has Character," Remy assured.

          "We had to wash the blood out of it…"

          "Blood?"

          "I'll explain another time," Kitty promised.

          "Petit?"     

          "Yes?" Kitty asked, cutting more hair off, going wild with the excitement of having control over this hair over his that had bugged her for so long.

          "I didn't…uhm…mean to cry last night."

          "I know," Kitty responded, "it's been a very hard time for us all, it just got to you, that's all," she admitted sounding quite casual about it.  She ran the brush through his hair then cut a little more.

          "It's just between us though, right?"

          "Of course," Kitty assured.

          "And…my problem?"

          "What problem?" Kitty asked, pulling his hair between his fingers and snipping carefully to layer the ends of his hair.

          "With the emotions and the mood swings…the whole manic depression thing?" he asked quietly, sounding quite embarrassed about it.

          "Oh…that?" Kitty asked, sounding a little troubled.

          "Why do you sound like that?" Remy asked, he stopped her and turned towards her looking like a split personality with one side of his hair long and the other short.

          "Uhm…it's just that when the cops raided your apartment they found all your medications…and uhm, they told reporters and it was in all the newspapers…" Kitty said, "so…everyone kind of knows…"

          "Fuck," he made a face.

          Kitty turned him back around, "I'm sure they've already forgotten about it…who cares anyway, its your problem, not theirs."

          Remy sighed, "that's easy for you to say…I don't want people knowin' how I can be…it's bad enough them knowin' how I was before it all…"

          Kitty patted his shoulder, "I'm sure it'll be fine."

          Rogue's head swung around when she saw Remy coming out of the back doorway of the mansion, his hair damp, severely short compared to it's previous length.  From the long ponytail that had touched his backside to just below his ears it had almost completely transformed his face, accenting his strong jaw, the layers giving him a more clean cut look.  "Wow…" she whispered, gaping.

          Remy glanced over at her and acknowledged her ever so slightly, then headed towards the beer cooler – which Kurt was guarding with his life in case any of the students were to try and steal some – and grabbed a bottle.  He took the cap off with his teeth and spat it back into the cooler.

          "Charming, Gambit, Charming," Kurt responded.

          "You know it," Remy grinned, and headed towards the table where Rogue was, he dropped into the unoccupied seat beside her, "'sup?" He asked lightly.

          "Uhm…nothing…" Rogue said, a little flustered.  She felt like a silly school girl with her first crush, he'd shaven, put on some old swim trunks, his hair was so much more attractive and he was a damn site cleaner than when she'd seen him.  Despite his bruises cuts and slight burns, he looked exceptionally handsome. 

          "So, Gambit," the Professor, who was sitting to Rogue's right said, sounding quite congenial.  "Have you thought anymore about whether you might join the X-Men again?" he asked.

          Remy gave a shrug, "I'll get back t' ya on that," he took a drink of his beer.

          "You do that," The Professor smiled, pulled out from under the table, and wheeled himself away to speak with Ororo who was sunbathing by the pool. 

          Rogue ran her gloved fingers along the table absently, "so…haircut, huh?"

          "Kitty did it," Remy answered, "a lot of my hair was singed by the blast from the explosion so…" he touched his damp hair absently.  "Like it?"

          "It's you," Rogue responded, she took a sip of her lemonade, "she did a good job."

          "Yeah, she wanted to do it for a while…" Remy said casually.  He glanced at her, she was wearing a pale green chiffon sundress that covered her completely, the sleeves were see-through  and she had lacy white gloves on that complimented it perfectly. 

          "Yeah, she's like that…it's her pet peeve when a guy has nicer hair than she does," Rogue smirked.

          Remy nodded, "so I believe…" he looked at her, "y'know…I think this is…the first proper time we have a conversation since…y'know…"

          Rogue nodded softly.  "yeah...I guess…at least where one of us hasn't been pissed at the other…" she added.  She glanced over to the kids splashing in the pool.

          "If neither of us was pissed at the other for something I guess we'd have nothing to talk about at all, really, would we?" he asked.

          Rogue smirked, "remember that time you sent me the naked picture of you but it was your head photoshopped onto some gay model's body?" she asked.

          Remy chuckled, "yeah.  Kitty had it under her pillow," he reminded.  "I always wondered why, I mean she told me she never really had a crush on me so WHY did she have that under her pillow…"

"I don't know, she probably pasted Orlando Bloom's head onto it or something.," Rogue suggested.

Remy snorted, "yeah, probably…"

Rogue shook her head, "we were a little crazy when we were young I guess."

          "Yeah…" he answered, "now we're all grown up…and a lot crazy."

          Rogue smirked, "how things change."

          "Yeah…how they do."

          Rogue paused for thought then turned to him, "want to take a walk around the lake?" she asked, noticing it was quieter around there, at least they could be together alone for the first time in a while.

          Remy stopped to consider this, then shrugged, "alright."


	4. Chapter 4: Sweet Misery

Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 15

Chapter 4: Sweet Misery

          "It's so beautiful down here, isn't it?" Rogue said softly as she walked along side the lake with Remy by her side.  They walked slowly, taking in the scenery.  The sun blazing down.  It felt like mid summer weather, and it was pleasant and calming. 

          "Always has been," Remy said.  "Liked to come down here a lot to think, especially when I was feelin' less than happy – which has been a lot lately.  But then…you probably knew that…" Remy said.  He walked with his arms folded lightly since he had no pockets to put his hands in.

          "Only from what I read in the papers," Rogue admitted after a moment, realising what he was getting at.  Something about the way he said it seemed to be getting at something. 

          "Does it bother you?" he asked.  He glanced over the water, watching it sparkle in the sun, it seemed like paradise compared to where he'd been, and compared to the wintery weather he remembered it having been.

          "Should it?" Rogue asked, "You're asking me?  Me who wore nothing but black for five years straight, years of therapy trying to deal with my powers and my emotions and everything…tried to kill myself…any of that ring a bell?" she asked, incredulously. 

          He looked at her, unsure how to take this, really.  He just looked at her.  She looked so beautiful in the sun that he found it very hard to control the emotions that built up inside him.  A mix of anger and love that reminded him of how it truly was to feel for someone.

          "C'mon, Remy…sure, it BOTHERS me, but…it doesn't make me uncomfortable," she stated, "over all the time we spent trying to find you it I don't think I gave it much thought either even though I knew you felt so badly."

          His eyes met hers as they walked.  "How does it bother you."

          Rogue stopped and turned fully towards, "that you're hurtin'…" she said softly.

          Remy moved, "no no no, I don't need to hear this…" he said, "see you always do this…you say the right thing…and I fall and then I mess up…and…and…" he gestured wildly trying to express himself but stumbled over the words.

          Rogue took a hold of his arms tenderly, a little nervously, "who says you're going to mess up?" she asked softly.

          Remy looked away, "always happens don't it?  We're fated to always be screwed over by our feelings for each other.   Sweet misery…that's all we every cause each other…it don't mean to but…it happens nonetheless…"

          Rogue let go of his arms and turned to walk away.  Remy sighed and followed on.

          "I'm still mad at you," he said, "I've never been able to forgive you for just…just assuming I had just plain out killed that kid Jared in cold blood…when you knew me…you didn't have any faith in me…"

          Rogue kept her head turned, and nodded, "understandable…and I'm still mad at you for all the stupid stuff you did…but…life goes on.  How long can we hold a grudge?  Not forever…like I say, life goes on."

          "Right," he uttered, "until the next stupid thing I do…and it always comes down to what I do…it's always my fault, and I'm this close to a break down…" he stopped her and turned her towards him, he showed her the centimetre space between his thumb and index finger.

          She sucked in her breath, that wasn't good enough.  She wasn't going to let him deter her from doing this.  Even if he told her he didn't feel the same, she didn't care, she had to tell him.  "I love you."

          Remy stepped back slowly, he hadn't expected her to just come out with it as suddenly as she had.   He looked at her, he might have cried but he never wanted her to see his tears again.  It left him too vulnerable and he knew if he cried she'd hold him and then he'd fall into that trap, in love, out of luck and out the window.  It was always the same.  "Rogue…"

          "You never call me Chere much anymore," Rogue said softly, "can't remember the last time you even called me by my real name," she looked to the ground.  "I remember the last time you held me though…" her eyes came over as distant, she seemed a thousand miles away, lost in her memories.  "And I remember the last thing I ever said to you that night…do you remember?"

          Remy shook his head, "no…" he said. 

          Rogue looked up at him, eyes meeting his once again, "you wanted to leave…you were growing tense, worried something was going to happen…and I told you why – even though I loved you much as I did – why I couldn't ever just up and leave like you wanted to…"

          Remy frowned, trying to remember, "remind me…"

          "Because if I left I'd be forfeiting my chances to make a difference in the world…and chances of learning to control my powers…" she said, "and what if I had left, Remy.  None of this might have happened but is there any guarantee we'd be any the happier?" she asked. 

          Remy shrugged.

          "And that night YOU broke your promise to me," Rogue said, "I asked you before I left you room that night…I said 'you're not going to leave, are you?'…and you said no…but…you did…" her eyes teared up.  "I was SO mad at you…I spent seven YEARS being mad at you…and I'm STILL angry at you…but I still love you even though I am…"

          Remy kept his eyes on her still, his heart felt as if it were beating at an abnormal rate, he wasn't sure if this was one of his panicky moments or if it was her getting through.

          "So what if I blamed you?" she asked.  "You broke your promise, I felt betrayed…we both made mistakes – we lost each other because of those mistakes…"

          Remy shook his head, "we can't get what we had back, Rogue…we just can't…it's truly over…I knew that when you tried to kiss me and I pushed you back despite how much I wanted that k— uh…yeah, so I wanted the kiss…doesn't mean that we're still…meant to be…god I don't know what I'm talking about anymore…" he sat on the grass near the lake, head in his hands, trying to figure out what he wanted.

          Rogue sat down beside him, "so what if we can't have what we had back then…we were KIDS.  Things would never be the same anyway, right?" she asked.

          Remy rubbed his head, "I don't know."

          "Remy, look, just STAY with the X-Men, and we'll work at a friendship…and…a relationship…and now that we're older there's a chance maybe we can make it work…we've had time to learn from our mistakes…maybe that's going to make the difference."

          Remy rested his elbows upon his knees, he looked away, his eyes glassy, "I don't think I can think any more about this, Rogue…" he said sadly.

          Rogue swallowed, she could see the emotion in his eyes.  He cared, he just couldn't say it.  "Look me in the eyes and tell me – from your heart – that you don't want to try and make it work, and I'll drop it now…just…do it…"

          Remy turned and looked at her, his eyes very watery, he shook his head, "I can't…" he swallowed his tears back, "I can't…" he said near to a sob, and walked off.

          Kitty sighed watching Remy and Rogue from where she sat at the patio table with Piotr.  They were eating burgers on buns, recently off the barbecue.  The apparent emotion that was showing on Rogue and Remy – even from the distance – was enough to make Kitty feel less than hungry. 

          "Looks like things aren't good," she sighed.

          "But I cooked the burgers all the way through," Piotr said, lifting the top half of his bun to check his burger.

          "Not the food, duh," Kitty rolled her eyes, "Rogue and Remy…looks like they aren't going to be getting back together…god they're so stupid…they love each other and they just…can't work it out…it's probably his fault.  Men just DON'T get it sometimes," she said, she gave Piotr a meaningful look, then got up, "I should go see if he's alright."

          "I am sure he will be fine," Piotr said.

          "I should check anyway," Kitty uttered.  She began to head down the hill towards where Remy was coming in the direction from there towards the hill.  Kitty had spent the last half hour at the table talking about relationships and making hints at Piotr – none of them he'd fallen for of course. 

She felt like giving up and going back to Kurt, it would be so much easier, although not as romantic, she decided.

          "What's going on?" Kitty asked as she met with Remy halfway.

          "I need to go," Remy said softly, he walked straight past her and up to the house, passing by everyone without even a second glance, he went inside.  

          "Go?  Go where?" Kitty asked after she'd caught up with him.

          "Anywhere but here, anywhere but near her…I can't be with her…it's all too…I don't know, too good to be true…" he headed upstairs into the room he'd been staying in. 

          "What are you talking about?!?" Kitty asked, "How can it be too good to be true?!" she followed him into the room.

          "She's MAD at me but she still wants to be with me?  There's got to be some catch somewhere, right?" he asked, he grabbed a pair of jeans where they'd been hanging over a chair and pulled them on over his trunks.

          "There's no CATCH, you dipstick, she's in fucking love.  She's spent this last month mooning over you, hopin' to god that you were alright.  One of those stupid fucking clones was found and we THOUGHT it was you, it went psycho and committed suicide and we were ALL devastated but Rogue was heartbroken…you're here, can you BLAME her for wanting to be with you again?"

          Remy looked at Kitty, "If I stay here, I'm going to go crazy…I'm not stable…and I'm not ready for a relationship…and…are my clones as crazy as I am?" he asked completely out of the blue.  "No…I need to get out of here…really…before everything goes kaput…it'll be better for me and her…"

          Kitty shook her head, "I can't believe you're running again…"

          "What are you talking about?"

          "You RAN like a scared kid when the accident with that stupid Jared happened…and now you're intent on running away again…I thought you were just a little braver than that."


	5. Chapter 5: The Escape

Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 15

Chapter 5: The Escape

          It was only an hour and twenty minutes later when Rogue stared out of the window of the upstairs hallway gazing over the driveway, she couldn't believe that he'd gone.  She saw him leaving on that old bike that he'd been fixing for years, the engine was loud, and droned off in the distance as he headed down the drive and disappeared through the gates.  Somehow he'd gotten that decrepit old monstrosity working enough to get him out of there.  She couldn't believe it.  Eight years it had lay in the garage doing nothing and within an hour he managed to fix it.  It felt as if every time she went to the garage she'd notice the empty space where it had always remained untouched, rusting and covered with dust. 

          "Why'd he have to go?" she asked, knowing Kitty Pryde was hanging around at her back watching, being there for support in case Rogue needed to cry or scream about the situation.

          "Because he got scared, I guess," Kitty approached, hugging an oversized dark grey sweater around her.  The building had grown cold suddenly within the last half hour.  Outside dark clouds had begun to dapple the sky promising rain.  The warm weather had been short lived and the X-Men had all retired inside after their barbecue. 

It had almost seemed like the moment Remy had abandoned the estate, the clouds had come.  It felt like that way within her soul also.  He hadn't even had the nerve to say goodbye to her.  It all seemed so unfair.  To have gone through so much pain and exhaustion, trouble and tears just to have him walk away at the end of it.  Even the consolation that a thousand other mutants had been rescued did little to lift her spirits.

          "How could he just…leave…I told him I loved him, didn't that mean anything to him?" Rogue asked, her eyes tearing up a little.

          Rogue heard the heavy footsteps of Piotr Rasputin also approaching, "perhaps…your desperation slightly frightened him…"

          "I was not desperate," Rogue sighed.  "And since when has desperation ever bothered a guy like Remy LeBeau…?" she asked.  "He's not the type of guy to scare easily…"

          Kitty glanced over to Piotr, "you're not helping, Piotr," she said in a low tone.  "If you really want to help, then go out there and see if you can catch up and convince him to come back…he's driven away on a motorbike that's been in pieces for like eight years, it'll probably fall apart if it storms and it looks pretty bad outside – just go do that – for me?"

          "Of course I will," Piotr said softly, and with those words, he turned and left heading down the grand staircase.  Seconds later they could hear the soft slam of the door and the sound of Piotr's own motorcycle driving away.

          "He'll be back, Rogue," Kitty assured after Piotr was finally gone.  "He might be scared but he's still in love…he told me so…I talked to him last night.  He's gonna realise he's made a mistake and he's going to turn back.  And he'll be here…"

          "How do you know?" Rogue demanded, she pushed some of the locks of white hair from her streaks away from her face, she looked at Kitty through hurt eyes.

          "Because I know him and I know he regrets things and he left you once and I don't think he's going to want to do it again…" Kitty said softly, she touched Rogue's shoulder, "you're the woman no other woman can compare to…"

          "He said that?" Rogue looked at Kitty hopefully.

          "Yeah, he did…" Kitty said, "and a guy like Remy wouldn't just make up stuff like that during his saddest moments if it wasn't true…" she reminded.  "I know he's going to be back…"

          Remy LeBeau had been driving through a light rain for several miles.  His thoughts were screaming at him calling him a foolish and frightened, but it felt good to be away from Rogue nonetheless.  His thoughts felt clearer, and he didn't have to worry about seeing her face and falling hopelessly in love.

He was in love though, and there was nothing he could do about it but tolerate it.  It was better to end things this way, his running meant she didn't have to say goodbye, and goodbyes could be emotional.  And if he was out of her life she would have better chances of having a happier life with someone else.  Maybe one day she'd control those powers…and fall in love with one of her colleagues…

_She deserves more than me_, he thought.  There were other things he needed to take care of also that he knew he shouldn't neglect.  His situation with Sinister, Chantal and Magneto could not yet be over, for he had not seen any of them dead.  Despite the control centre of the GMCF had been destroyed, their research had not been, and it would probably not take long before more clones were created.  More MX2 would be made and used against mutants.  A bigger prison would be constructed, and a bigger plan would be carried out.  Remy felt he had to keep that thought in mind and find out more

Remy was surprised when down the road Piotr on his motorcycle overtook him. Swerved and blocked the way.  Remy swerved to avoid a collision and the bike came to a stop, frowned, "what do you think you're doin'?" he asked, slightly annoyed at the delay.  He felt if he didn't get away soon from Bayville he'd lose his nerve and not be able to go any further. 

          "Stopping you from making the biggest mistake of your life my friend," Piotr responded.  "Kitty sent me for you, asked me to convince you to come back if I could…for her, for Rogue…"

          Remy shook his head, "I can't…I just can't…you don't GET it."

          "What are you so afraid of?" Piotr asked.  "A woman's love?  Some people would kill for such a thing."

          "No…I'm not scared of love," Remy responded coolly, his dark eyes gazing over at the large man.  The two had never really gotten along, and it seemed even strange he would have agreed to come after him.

          "It seems to me you are…you're scared of something that's for sure."

          "I'm not scared," Remy frowned, "I just don't want to be…a disappointment to her…or to myself…" he got off his bike and walked over, "I couldn't even look her in the eye when she asked me to tell her I didn't want to try and make it work…me…the world's best liar…couldn't use an ounce of my charm against her…"

          "You feel ashamed?" Piotr asked.  "Perhaps that you could not lie to her was a good thing…perhaps this is a sign that finally you can be honest with her – and I know that your relationship with her in the past was not exactly an honest one."

          Remy shrugged, "I know that...but…I'm in a bad place right now and she just doesn't get that…she's been through a lot, but…I'm so incredibly…I mean…I just…"

"Is this about what was in the newspapers?  About the depression?"

"Yes," Remy said, "How can I make her happy when I can't even make myself happy?" he demanded, "How can I be with her when my jumps from contented and joking to sad and suicidal as quick as a lightswitch turns on and off?"

          "You can try…and that would be good enough for Rogue," Piotr said firmly, his cornflower blue eyes squinting.  He seemed determined to not let Remy go without an argument.

          "No it wouldn't be, Piotr!  You just don't get it!  How can I make you understand how frantic I feel that I might hurt Rogue when you don't even have eyes to see a girl is hopelessly in love with you?!" Remy looked away, downcast.

          "What?" Piotr asked, looking confused and taken aback.

          "Hmm?" Remy responded, a little side tracked.  He'd been talking so fast and carelessly he hadn't realised what he'd said.

          "What girl is hopelessly in love with me?" Piotr asked.

          "Uhm…I need to go," Remy climbed back onto his bike, "get out of the road."

          "No, I want to know who this girl is!  You have intrigued me…" Piotr frowned.

          Remy sighed, "Kitty is crazy about you, you see it in those eyes of hers…she even told me so…and you are just totally oblivious to it."

          "Oh…" Piotr's mouth dropped, he seemed deep in thought as if trying to recognise a memory that it might have hinted towards the girls feelings.  

          Remy looked up as the rain began to come down heavier.  "I have to go, Piotr…the rain is comin' down a lot heavier and I still have a lot of mileage to cover…I've made my decision and I'm going to live by it," he explained, "Besides, I got other stuff to do…and it has importance…I started it in the first place FOR Rogue…I can't just drop it now after so much hard work.  Seven years I put into this…"

          Piotr pulled himself out of his temporary reverie, "You will find yourself in regret if you do not turn around and face her and tell her you love her…you know you do…when you speak of her, your eyes light up, you, a man who I worked with and thought had very little true emotion…"

          The words made Remy quiver slightly, he was reminded of the conversation he'd had with Kitty the night before. 

          "You will kick yourself for the rest of your life if you do not turn back now…is that how you want to live?"

          "I don't deserve her anyway," Remy said, and he was glad the rain drops running down his cheeks were hiding the tears that had broke free of his eyes.  "I never did," he admitted, "and she's too good to deserve a rat like me…" he revved his bike up, "tell her I'm sorry but it's for the best."

          "I am sorry you feel that way, Remy….but I will tell her.  If you are determined to go, I cannot stop you any more," Piotr said, "it is on your head now what you do."


	6. Chapter 6: I'm Sorry

Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 15

Chapter 6: I'm Sorry

          Piotr returned within the hour, soaking wet and his expression downcast.  Rogue and Kitty had been waiting patiently in the hallway, Rogue keeping her fingers crossed that soon Remy might come running through those doors to embrace her fiercely and tell her he loved her.  But when Piotr came through that door, she knew that it was unlikely.  The last remnants of hope she'd had were scattered like grains of sand, and were blowing away with the pain.

          "I tried to stop him from going," Piotr stated softly, "But, I am afraid I could not do anything, he had made up his mind…"

          Rogue put her hands to her face and let out a sob, she could not speak, no words would express the grief.  She'd lost him again.

          "He told me to tell you he is sorry…but it is for the best," Piotr said, he moved over and put a large hand on her shoulder.

          Rogue pulled away, "leave me alone," she sobbed, and ran upstairs to be alone, right now she didn't want to be with anyone.

          Kitty sighed, she heard Rogue's bedroom door slamming loudly.  "All this hard work in trying to reunite them only to see them break further apart…" she sighed, "It's so depressing I could cry…I really hoped that this might all be resolved."

          Piotr sat upon the stairs and ran his fingers through his neat yet wet black hair, "He is a fool to give her up…"

          "I shouldn't have sent you after him," Kitty decided, "that's maybe a little pushy, he certainly wouldn't want to come back now…"

          Piotr paused for a moment, deep in thought, "it is his decision if he wishes to leave or stay, we cannot do that for him…but I do think he is making the biggest mistake of his life if he continues down the road he's going.  But he must learn that on his own."

          Kitty remained quiet, deep in thought about unrequited love.  Almost as if he were sensing her thoughts, Piotr suddenly brought the subject up, "have you ever loved someone so much but known you could never be with them?"

          Kitty drew in a deep breath, her heart stopped for a moment, then began to beat at an odd rhythm, "why?"

          "I am curious…" Piotr answered softly.

          "Well…" Kitty sighed, she decided to bring it up, it wasn't like he might catch on it was him.  She'd done everything she could to hint to the fact and he hadn't figured it out yet.  "There was this one guy…every time I see him my heart feels like it's going to explode if I don't tell him…but every time I try…" Kitty turned and looked at him, "I stumble on the words and can't get it out…"

          "I see…" Piotr remarked, keeping his eyes on her, "how long has this been going on…?" he was looking at her so curiously that it made Kitty feel almost slightly uncomfortable.

          "It was always a crush," Kitty added, "but…when y—I mean he---joined the X-Men some time ago…it started to get serious…"

          "Mmm," Piotr nodded, paying close.  There was something about the way he was there sitting, listening that made her wonder if he was half expecting something.

          "And now, I see Rogue…and Remy, so much in love, and yet so unreciprocated, that…it almost breaks my heart, and I just…wonder if maybe…that's going to end up being me, and y—this guy…" Kitty swallowed nervously, she ran her fingers through her short brown hair, her eyes gazing up at him. 

          "Hmm," Piotr said nothing for some moments.

          Why is he looking at me like that?  Kitty pondered, she began to feel strangely uncomfortable in his presence.  What's going on in that big thick skull of his?

          After some moments, Piotr finally spoke.  "I think…if you feel this strongly - and it's quite obvious that you do – then you should swallow your fears…and tell him."

          "It's harder than it seems," Kitty sighed, "I mean y—I mean this guy—he like…travels just about all the time…and once I tell him it might be like 'okay, thanks for sharing' and then he ups and disappears again for months at a time…and…then what if I tell him and he's like 'I don't like you THAT way' and thinks I should be with my old boyfriend Kurt and…god…so many things could just go so wrong…"

          "How will you ever know until you tell him though?" Piotr asked, "there could be a slight chance this man may have been holding feelings for you, he might have been the type of man who thought perhaps you were beautiful and sweet, but thought you were maybe too good for him or that you never noticed him or that maybe he just never could have believed that a good friend could have felt this way for him – there could be a million different reasons why…but you will never know until you find it in yourself to tell m—uh, him."

          "Hmm?" Kitty asked, looking at him, not quite understanding.

          "Tell him," Piotr encouraged.

          Kitty fell into silence, how could she?  He still seemed so oblivious to what she was trying to say, why was it he never seemed to get those hints?  Was it that he didn't have enough knowledge of the English language to see flirting when it was right there?  She didn't know.  "I…should probably go check on Rogue," she stood up and hopped up two of the steps.

          "One more thing before you go…" Piotr said, which made Kitty stop abruptly in her tracks and turned.

          Kitty looked at him with her wide curious sapphire eyes, he reached out tenderly towards her taking bother her arms, leading them around his neck, "mmm…what are you doing?" she asked, not fully understanding his actions.

          "Making the leap that you just can't seem to…and sometimes even when you don't think so, actions speak louder than the words that have so much trouble getting out…" he replied softly and he leaned in and brushed his lips against hers.

          Rogue sighed, she stared over the banister down into the foyer where at the bottom steps, Kitty and Piotr were kissing softly.  An ache came about within her that still made her jealous of those who were able to kiss and probably never fully appreciated the simplicity of it, the wonderfulness of touch. 

          Despite Remy had left her for good, she still found a touch of emotion left to feel happy for Kitty.  Kitty really seemed to have deeper feelings for Piotr than she'd realised at first, but now, Piotr seemed quite open to that and Rogue smiled a little through her tears. 

At _least someone's found a happy ending_, she thought sadly.  Rogue felt like a walk in the rain to wash away some of those tears, to cool her puffy face.  She exited through the nearest window, which led her to the back driveway, she landed softly upon the ground and began to walk slowly, still aching.

It almost seemed as if the pain she'd received from the Genosha ordeal was all that she had left of Remy LeBeau now.   That pain reminded her of how vulnerable she had been – and in some way still was.  That pain reminder her of how human she was and that was the only small comfort she had.

The sky was so dark now despite it was only around five pm.  The rain came down heavily, curtains of it so thick she could barely see anything around her, it bounced off the driveway like a thick mist, and it was so loud it seemed to drown out everything else from her hearing.

She wondered where she might pick up the pieces of her life before Remy had come back once again.  Things had been fine, she'd been happy again, although something had always been missing and now she understood it had always been Remy that had left her empty.

_I should have tried harder to make him stay…maybe I was a bit too desperate_, she thought.  _The guy has issues…and I probably wasn't helping him by telling him I loved him…looked as if he barely loved himself anymore let alone anyone else…_

A chill swept over the estate, and Rogue hugged herself in her dress, she was soaked through completely, her long hair straight and dripping.  A feeling built up within her, it had been a long time since she'd felt that way, as if her heart were rising up in her chest and beginning to beat once again.  A familiar scent crossed the air, mixed with the smell of the rain in the trees of the woods.  It was like cologne.  The cologne Remy wore.

Rogue closed her eyes, and breathed it in.  That scent she'd always connected to him.  It was so close by her.  It must have hung around in the air after he'd left.  That smell that defined him, filled her senses, reminded her of being up close against him.  That scent had never changed in nine years, from the minute he'd joined the X-Men and she'd first noticed it to this very moment, it still smelled the same, and it lifted her heart ever so slightly.

"I'm sorry."

Rogue's kept her eyes closed, she was not sure if this was some kind of hallucination or not, but she'd heard his voice, and as remained deep in the reverie and drowning in his scent she felt his arms wrapping around her from behind, being ever so tender, as if he sensed where every bruise and ache was and was trying hard not to hurt her, she felt her body sink into his, she opened her eyes and looked down to see his arms there, the threadbare material of that god awful coat that must have been as old as he was – the same coat that had been worn by the injured clone.  But this wasn't a clone this time.   

Tears broke free from her eyes, tears of joy.  She wasn't imagining this, he was there, he was real, it was his arms wrapped around her.  He was trembling in the rain, just like she was now. 

"I'm so sorry, Chere…" he murmured near her ear, a half sob escaped his lips,  "I'm so…so…sorry."

(The end!      Or is it?  DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN – thanks to my favourite readers ishandahalf, Rogue4787 and my crack ho clone-loving freak Aro for the awesome reviews up til now.  Hope that satisfies a lot of people – for now.  :D)


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